You Know You've Been in Vietnam for 2 Months When...

•  You’re excited when there’s toilet paper
• Speaking of toilet paper, it’s a treat when there is a squatter rather than just a whole in the ground
• You don’t look twice at that one motorbike piled with 5 people, 2 live chickens, 1 pig, and a couple of bamboo mats
• You feel like something’s missing when a  fish or chicken head isn’t in dinner’s soup
• You're hotel might also sideline as a brothel 
• Stripes and poka dots together doens't seem so off anymore
• You have started measuring things in cement bags ex: “I’m so hungry I could eat 2 cement bags full of rice!”
• You're use to the restaurants doubling as the family's living room
• Your hair has yet to come out of a braid or ponytail
• You might not like the stench of the market, but now you can at least tell the difference between some of the smells-squid, dried shrimp, durian, raw meat, fish
• Last night you dreamed of eating a hamburger (with peanuts and salmon on top?), and the night before, a Chipolte burrito.  Turns out malaria pills give you weird dreams, and we are all craving American food
• You have replaced your morning makeup with a bucket of sunscreen and insect repellent
• A lizard falls from the sky onto your arm as you’re eating your rice (just happened to me!)
• Your conversations include all the American food you are going to eat when you get back
• One minute there’s a caged live chicken in front of the restaurant, and after you order, the chicken is gone
• You’ve taken a nap 2 feet from a national highway
• You haven’t been on Facebook once
• You’re use to the “more than occasional” lizard or cockroach hanging around in your room
• You’re confused when there’s no rice on the table
• You are no longer fazed by the yells, hollars, hoots, and stares
• You’ve stopped comparing bug bites - we all have too many to count
• You have no idea what the “Top Ten’ songs are on iTunes or what movies are out
• You no longer think that all those people with masks are doctors or their patients
• You’ve finally learned how to properly wash your clothes by hand
• You’ve had someone drive by on their motorbike and try to snag your purse (happened to Devyn-we won!)
• You don’t look twice at all the crazy food- scorpions, cobras, eggs with baby ducks inside, congealed blood, etc.
• You’ve eaten enough rice to fill a swimming pool
• You can successfully walk across a street in Saigon without flinching-imagine: NO crosswalks, no traffic rules, motorbikes and cars everywhere
• You know how to order dog meat, although you will NEVER eat it!
• You can take regular naps on a bamboo mat on the cement floor without getting a crick in your neck
• You have mastered the art of the chopstick – or at least, relatively
• After Quang Tri, you don’t think Saigon is that hot
• You haven't watched TV-no Bachlorette or Pretty Little Liars 
• You fell in love with the country and are sad to leave the yummy food and friendly people